On the 21st June 2023 I gave a presentation at the Music4Change International Research School & Mentor Hub. I introduced my postdoc project, and performed my letter for Louise piano & toy piano programme.
In September last year my baby daughter, Louise, was born. In my inexperience as a first time mother, I had fairly ambitious plans for my concerts which were schedule for a few months after the baby was born. When she arrived, the reality showed itself very different, and I had to rearrange my plans.
The letter for Louise programme is made of pieces which could fit in the few minutes that I had to practice in between her demands. Also, these were pieces that the baby seemed to enjoy listening to when I was practicing.
To be honest, this programme wasn’t initially thought to be connected with my new research project. However, I could see it as a first experience of developing a piano recital in kind of “collaboration” with my “audience”. Although being a baby and having no idea of what was going on, Louise set the tone of this programme. Also, I can say that in a way she has chosen the repertoire, or at least had a very strong voice in it.
This experience encouraged me to start reflecting about what is left of my voice and my sense of ownership of my own recital programme. It also inspired me to think about surprising paths and some freedom that can emerge from ‘letting go’ of my authorship over my programme.
In the presentation Louise and another baby were in the auditorium (besides the grown-up audiência of the conference, of course). The presence of the babies brought me thoughts about challenges to the space and a degree of provocation to [academic / professional] expectations.
I received very inspired feedback, including thoughts about lullabies, polyphony and rhythm as an aspect of parent + baby interaction, sacralisation / desacralisation of motherhood, pedagogical aspirations behind musical interaction with my baby, among other comments.
I have been finding it very interesting this dynamic of fluid dialogues where life informs art then art informs research, and research provokes back art, which then influences life.
You can read the abstract and see my presentation here.
Special thanks to the Music4Change team, my supervisor Dr Jill Halstead and to my respondents Halldis Hønning and Dr Daniel Peter Biro.
My research is generously funded by the European Union.